Lifelong Affair Read online

  'I will in future.' He put the bottle down as it was finished with. 'Here, let me,' she draped a towel over his shoulder. 'A bit late for that, isn't it?' he mocked 'Better late than never,' she quipped, wiping Courtney's mouth as he was a little sick. 'See,' she said with satisfaction. 'He's almost asleep,' she murmured softly a few minutes later, as the baby's head turned to one side and his eyes closed.

  Alex stood up to lay the drowsy baby gently back in his crib. 'I sent Mrs Ford to dinner and thought I would see what it was that's given you that glow for the last few days.'

  'Well, it wasn't having Courtney being sick down my back,' she retorted to hide her embarrassment. She hadn't been aware of having a glow, or the fact that Alex had noticed it.

  He eased the dampness of the silk material from his shoulders. 'God, my shirt stinks!'

  'So will you,' she assured him. 'I should get that shirt washed immediately. And you'll need a shower.' 'And I always thought babies smelt of talcum powder!'

  'Poor Alex!' she laughed softly. 'Hm,' he grimaced. 'I didn't deprive you of your nightly treat, did I? Mrs Ford tells me you've been mainly feeding and caring for Courtney yourself.'

  'I've enjoyed it.' It also gave her something to do. She was left mainly to her own devices, Alex either at work or in his study, and she liked being with Courtney.

  He nodded, moving out of the nursery and into the corridor so that their conversation didn't disturb the sleeping baby. 'The funerals are tomorrow, Morgan,' he told her quietly. 'They've been arranged for the afternoon." She had paled at his first mention of funerals. She known that the bodies from the crash had been released for burial now, but Alex hadn't mentioned Ac funerals to her before. "'I've spoken to your parents,' he continued in the emotionless voice that she so hated. 'Your father still wasn't well enough to travel, and your mother doesn't fed she should leave him at such a time.'

  "Of course not,' she snapped. She knew exactly how her father was; she had telephoned America several tones since her arrival here. The closeness she had felt •D Alex while they were with Courtney had completely gone, and the resentment was now back with a vengeance. 'You should have let me tell them.'

  'It wasn't necessary '

  "They're my parents, damn it!'

  'Why do you always resort to swearing when you lose your temper?' he bit out.

  "Why do you always make me lose my temper?' she said.

  'I have no idea,' he said grimly.

  'I do!' she glared at him, her eyes sparkling deeply green. 'You have to be the most arrogant, bossy individual I've ever had the misfortune to meet. You had no right to talk to my parents about the funerals— I should have done it!'

  I didn't want to cause you any more pain

  'You mean you were too busy organising everyone to consider anyone else's feelings but your own,' she dismissed scathingly. 'I've been in control of my own Efe since I left home at eighteen to go to college, and then you come along, with your dictatorial ways and expect everyone to jump on command. Well, I don't jump, Mr Hammond, and quite frankly I never will!'

  He listened to her tirade in stony silence, a man who ran and owned an empire, who made decisions every day that affected thousands of lives, and the fact that one mere woman, one unwelcome woman in his home, dared to question his authority obviously came as a great and unexpected shock to him.

  'I intend returning to the States after—after the funerals,' she told him coldly. 'But only for a couple of weeks at most. And then I'll be back. And I'll right for custody of Courtney with every weapon I can think of.

  Alex shook his head. 'I can't let you have him.'

  'Because you consider my morals aren't good enough?' she taunted. 'You'll find nothing wrong with them, no matter how deeply you dig into my past. I've been too busy with my career the last few years to want to complicate my life with emotional entanglement, especially with Glenna's marriage as an example! She loved your brother, and yet she was still unhappy. I didn't want that for myself.'

  'Glenna mentioned someone called Sam.' He looked at her with narrowed eyes.

  She flushed. 'It would seem you spent a considerable amount of time talking to my sister.'

  He nodded distandy. 'She was an intelligent woman, and Mark wasn't always here. Glenna naturally told me about you, your parents—Sam.'

  'I've been seeing him for several months. But I certainly don't intend marrying him.'

  'I trust he knows that?

  'None of your business, Mr Hammond,' she snapped.

  'No,' he sighed, 'I don't suppose it is. All right, Morgan, have your time back in the States. But when you get back here don't expect to take Courtney away from me. He's a Hammond, he'll stay here where he belongs.'

  We'll see about that!'

  'Indeed we will,' he drawled confidendy, and left her to go to his bedroom to change his shirt.

  It was his confidence that worried her the most. He almost too confident, as if she didn't have a chance erf getting Courtney. And maybe she didn't. She had a fat against her—her job, her single state, the fact that Courtney had been born a British citizen. But she wouldn't give up without a fight, wouldn't be her feher's daughter if she did that!

  Morgan decided she hated funerals. She had never been to one before, had never had reason to, and those two coffins standing side by side in the church, all that remained of Glenna and Mark, seemed all the more heartrending.

  Alex stood at her side, had supported his mother all through the service as she seemed about to collapse. Morgan had driven to the church with them, Janet aid Charles Fairchild travelling in the car behind them, their two little girls being left with Charles' mother for the day.

  Morgan hated being in this cold emotionless church, hated the curious looks Mark's family directed at her, and she wondered why she didn't cry when it was her sister lying in one of those boxes.

  She refused to cry, refused to believe that any part of Glenna, the laughing beautiful woman that mattered, was anywhere near this sterile service, this Mark church. None of these people here had loved Glenna, none had tried to understand her—and her sister wouldn't give them the satisfaction of knowing how deeply she mourned her.

  By the time they got back to the house Rita Hammond seemed to have recovered her composure, and was acting the gracious hostess as the family began to arrive from the church.

  To Morgan it was just another part of the charade. How could these people genuinely feel the loss of two beautiful young people when they could stand around drinking sherry and eating the trays of food the staff were circulating with? Morgan couldn't have eaten a thing and, quite frankly, the whole thing made her feel sick.

  She wanted to escape, to get away from here, and yet pride kept her standing in the room, that and her love for Glenna. Her sister hadn't been one to run away from a fight, and neither would she.

  'She finally got her wish.'

  Morgan spun round to confront Janet Fairchild, instantly tensing. Janet was as cold and calculating as her mother. She even looked like her with her cold blue eyes and tightly drawn back black hair, and Morgan knew any attempt at conversation with her owed nothing to politeness.

  'I beg your pardon?' she said warily.

  'Glenna,' Janet drawled, dressed completely in black as was her mother; Morgan had chosen a less dramatic navy blue dress, not being out to make any impressions. 'She always wanted to get away from the family,' she taunted. 'She got her wish—although hardly in the way she expected.'

  Morgan drew in a harsh breath of pain. 'That's a disgusting thing to say!'

  Janet raised dark brows, coolly knocking the ash from her cigarette into the ashtray. 'Is it? Perhaps. But it's the truth, isn't it?' she shrugged.

  'Glenna was unhappy here, yes. But '

  'You knew about that?'

  She frowned. 'I don't think Glenna ever made any secret of the fact that she was—dissatisfied, with her life here.'

  'She wanted her career,' Janet scorned. 'Mark should never have married an actress.
It was obvious a woman like that could only be interested in his money.'

  Morgan gasped. Janet was more like her mother than she had previously realised, both of thern

  seeming to take delight in insulting the dead Glenna. 'Must I remind you that Glenna is—was—my sister?' her voice shook a little, and she saw the other woman's Mouth twist derisively at this show of weakness.

  Janet gave a dismissive snort. 'You don't need to remind me of anything; you're like Glenna in a lot of ways.'

  This time the insult was a personal attack, and Morgan didn't hesitate to retaliate. 'Did she also think you were a vicious bitch?' she asked coolly.

  Angry colour flooded the other woman's cheeks. •Glenna had more sense than to be openly hostile,' she snapped.

  She raised her brows, the brightness of her hair secured at her nape. 'And I don't?' she drawled. 'I'm sorry, Mrs Fairchild, I thought this was honesty time.'

  'It is.' Blue eyes flashed their dislike. 'I don't like you any more than I did Glenna. We'll certainly never make the mistake of letting another McKay into the family!'

  'Courtney is half McKay.'

  'I meant you, Morgan.' Janet looked at her with dislike. 'I'm telling you this in case you got the wrong idea from the newspapers.'

  'That I marry Alex!' she gasped.

  'Exactly.' , ,

  'Wouldn't he have some say as to who he married?' she derided.

  'Of course,' Janet snapped her impatience. 'And I can tell you now that he doesn't intend marrying anvone.'

  Morgan gave a bored shrug. 'You're safe then, aren't you?'

  'Unless you try to force the issue,' the other woman studied her with narrowed eyes, 'Alex will allow no harm to come to Courtney.'

  'I would never harm him!' she bit out angrily, tiring of this conversation with this vindictive woman. 'Must I remind you that this is a funeral, Mrs Fairchild? Hardly the place for the things you're saying!'

  'I can think of no better place,' Janet rasped. 'Glenna has created trouble, as always, she snapped. 'She must have known the havoc this joint guardianship would cause,'

  'She was hardly in any condition to think of hitting back at the Hammonds at the time,' Morgan told the other woman tautly.

  'Your sister was an embarrassment to my family from the day she came into it!'

  Her mouth twisted. 'Didn't she come up to your strict family standards?'

  •No!' Janet snapped. 'And she never would have done. If she hadn't become conveniently pregnant I doubt if the marriage would have lasted as long as it did.'

  'Conveniently .. .?' Morgan echoed sharply. 'Axe you implying that Glenna became pregnant on purpose?'

  'Exactly. Providing the Hammond heir was guaranteed to keep her the wife of a wealthy man. Except that I know for a fact that Mark didn't want children yet.'

  Morgan shrugged. 'Accidents happen.'

  'Not to Mark,' Janet told her pointedly.

  Morgan paled, swallowing convulsively. 'Arc you saying—Are you implying '

  'That someone else was involved in Courtney's conception?' the other woman drawled. 'Someone other than Mark? I'm saying it's a distinct possibility,' she shrugged.

  'I don't believe it! Morgan said heatedly. 'You're just saying these things. Glenna would never have an affair. She loved Mark very much.'

  'And she knew her marriage was failing. She wouldn't be the first woman to deliberately have a child in order to keep her marriage together—even another man's child.'

  'I don't believe that,' Morgan repeated coldly. •Glenna wasn't capable of what you're accusing her of.' Janet's mouth twisted derisively. 'Believe me, she was,' she taunted.

  Morgan was breathing deeply, so angry she wanted to actually hit this woman. The character of Mary-Beth would know how to handle this situation with a confidence that would strip this woman of all her arrogance. Unfortunately she didn't have an ounce of Mary-Beth in her! 'Arc you really serious about Courtney not being Mark's child?' she frowned.

  'Very serious,' the other woman nodded. 'But my mother believes he's Mark's son, and that's all that matters.'

  'A blood test——'

  'Might prove my point,' Janet acknowledged tauntingly. 'And then again it might not. But could vou do that to your own sister, your dead sister?'

  Morgan paled, knowing that Janet Fairchild was right. Even supposing Glenna had done such a thing— which she seriously doubted!—she couldn't do anvthing to hurt her sister's memory. Her parents would never forgive her if she did that. Besides, she didn't believe for one moment that Glenna had been involved with another man; despite her unhappiness in England Glenna had continued to love her husband.

  ' thought not,' the other woman derided. 'Go back to America, Morgan. You aren't wanted here.' She strolled off, smiling at several of the other guests as she went, just as if she hadn't just dealt Morgan a wounding blow.

  Morgan looked up as she sensed someone watching her, and her eyes clashed with questioning grey ones. Alex stood across the room talking to an elderly man, but his attention was only half held by the - conversation, the rest of it concentrated on her. She turned away from that probing glance, needing to escape, needing to be alone to think of all that Janet Fairchild had so enjoyed telling her.

  She moved to the doorway, glancing round, suddenly aware that Alex was making his way towards her. She didn't want to talk to him now, and she breathed a sigh of relief as one of the numerous relatives waylaid him, slipping out of the room unnoticed by any but those ail-seeing grey eyes.

  Mrs Ford was in the nursery with Courtney, cuddling the unusually fretful baby. 'I think he ate too much,' she smiled as Morgan came into the room.

  'Probably,' she smiled, knowing her nephew's appetite well. 'Would you like to go down to the kitchen and get yourself a cup of tea?' she offered. 'I'll stay with Courtney.' Well, if you're sure...?'

  'Very,' she nodded, knowing that after Janet Fairchild's vehemence Courtney's innocence was what she needed.

  "Thank you,' Mrs Ford smiled. 'I won't say it wouldn't be very welcome.'

  Morgan took the crying Courtney from the other woman, her expression softening as she gazed down at his cherubic features; he had filled out in just the last week. He stopped crying as soon as she took him into her arms.

  'He knows.' The nurse looked down at them, her own expression softened by the lovely picture Morgan made holding the baby.

  Morgan was bemused by the perfection of the tiny human being in her arms; she never ceased to be amazed by how beautiful her nephew was. 'Knows?' she echoed softly, deep blue eyes staring up at her as Courtney sucked on his fist.

  "That you love him,' Mrs Ford murmured. 'Oh, I love him too, but he senses that it isn't the same as what you feel for him. Babies are very intelligent when it comes to the people who care for them.'

  She wondered if that were the reason Courtney invariably cried when Rita Hammond or her daughter picked him up. And why he slept in Alex Hammond's arms? Alex was a part of this hateful family too, and yet Courtney instinctively trusted him.

  'I shouldn't be long,' the nurse nodded.

  Morgan didn't mind how long she was, she had no inclination to go back downstairs and join the vultures, would much prefer to spend the time with Courtney.

  But she couldn't stop herself from looking for some resemblance to Mark in the sleepy features beneath her. The bright red hair was strictly Glenna, the blue eyes, normal in most newborn babies, could have come from either parent. Of course there was the determination in the little chin that the nurse at the hospital had noticed, but Glenna had been very forceful, and Morgan had a stubborn streak herself. No, there was not one feature to distinguish Courtney as a Hammond.

  'I thought I might find you here.'

  She looked up at the sound of that familiar raspy voice, looking straight into Alex Hammond's harsh face. He leant against the door-jamb watching her. She wondered how long he had been standing there; she hadn't been aware of his presence until he spoke.

  Colour flus
hed her cheeks as she recalled her thoughts of a few minutes ago. Did this man also think Glenna had had an affair, that Courtney wasn't his brother's child? He gave no indication of harbouring any such thoughts about Glenna, but then he wasn't a man who gave away much of his thoughts, about anything. And perhaps if it were the truth his mother's resentment towards Glenna needed no further explanation.

  'I couldn't stand that circus any longer, she told him coldly, at once on the defensive.

  His mouth tightened, but he gave no other indication of his anger, and his voice was mild when he spoke. 'Would you rather no one had shown their respect?'

  'Respect I could understand. That,' she nodded in the direction of downstairs, 'is no better than a farce. They act as if this was a party!'

  'Would you rather they all stood about crying?'

  'At least it would be more natural!'

  He gave an impatient sigh. 'You call hiding in here natural?' he scorned. 'You can put Courtney down now,' he derided. 'He's been asleep for several minutes.'

  She glanced down at the sleeping baby, then stood up to place him in his crib, putting her hands awkwardly together now that she had nothing else to occupy them. She faced Alex uncomfortably across the room.

  'Why is it wc always meet in the nursery?' he asked softly.

  Morgan moistened her lips. 'I—I spend a lot of my time in here.'

  'I wasn't criticising,' he said gently, 'Merely stating a fact.'

  'The facts are, Mr Hammond, that the funerals are no more than a valid .excuse for your mother to act the gracious hostess,' all her resentment came to the fore to be directed at this man, 'and that I have just been highly insulted by your sister.'

  'Janet?' he frowned.

  Do you have another one?' she derided.

  'What did she say to you?' His eyes were narrowed to grey slits.

  'It isn't important that you know her exact words,' she shrugged dismissively; the enormity of what Janet Fairchild had said to her was still too new to take in—or share with this man. 'Some of it wasn't unlike the remarks you made to me when you came over to Los Angeles,' her head went back in challenge. His mouth tightened ominously. 'I thought we'd agreed that I regret that remark.'