Passion from the Past Read online

  She swallowed hard. ‘Gideon?’

  He nodded. ‘I’m sure he must have tried to explain to you.’ He saw her blush. ‘Yes, I thought so. Maybe now is the time to listen, hmm?’

  ‘I—I don’t know.’ She twisted her hands together. ‘What if you’re wrong?’

  ‘What have you got to lose?’

  Only her pride. And she was beginning to think that wasn’t worth much.

  Nigel pulled on his jacket. ‘Call him. It’s only eleven o’clock. And the way Gideon’s been looking lately I doubt he’s asleep.’ He bent down and kissed her lightly on the cheek. ‘Don’t invite me to the wedding, I’m a bad loser.’

  ‘Liar,’ she smiled. ‘You wouldn’t be doing this if you were a bad loser.’

  ‘Maybe not,’ he gave a rueful smile. ‘But make the call, eh?’

  ‘I—I’ll think about it.’

  ‘Laura!’

  ‘I can’t promise more than that,’ she told him pleadingly. ‘You could be wrong, you know.’

  ‘I could,’ he nodded. ‘But one telephone call isn’t going to hurt you.’

  ‘I have to work with him tomorrow—’

  ‘Take a chance, Laura,’ he encouraged.

  She stared at the telephone for over half an hour after Nigel had left, still undecided about whether or not she should call Gideon. She had nothing to lose, not when she had already admitted her love for him, and she had so much to gain if Nigel was right. But still she hesitated…

  Her mother was alone when she came home. ‘James has an early appointment,’ she explained. ‘Has Nigel gone?’

  ‘Yes, he—he had to leave early.’

  ‘Then why haven’t you gone to bed, dear? It’s almost twelve o’clock, you know.’

  ‘Yes, I know,’ Laura sighed. ‘Mum, have you seen Gideon lately?’

  Her mother’s gaze was instantly evasive. ‘A few times,’ she nodded.

  ‘And how—how does he treat you?’

  She frowned. ‘Treat me? I don’t understand what you mean.’

  ‘Well, is he—is he polite to you?’ Laura looked at her mother searchingly.

  ‘Of course he’s polite!’ She sounded surprised by such a question. ‘He’s always very friendly.’

  ‘Always?’ she frowned.

  Her mother flushed. ‘Well, James and I often take Natalie out, so I see Gideon then. He’s never been anything but polite to me.’

  ‘But friendly with it?’ Laura persisted. Surely if Gideon genuinely felt he had a grievance against her family then it would include her mother. He could be polite to her for James’s sake, but he didn’t have to be friendly too.

  ‘Very friendly,’ her mother nodded. ‘And he always asks about you.’

  Had she misjudged his motives? His open desire earlier this evening seemed to say she had.

  ‘Thanks, Mum,’ she glowed. ‘I want to make a telephone call now.’

  ‘This time of night?’ her mother gasped. ‘Who on earth—To Gideon?’ she suddenly realised.

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Then I’ll go to my room,’ she smiled, kissing Laura on the cheek. ‘And I think you’re doing the right thing, dear.’

  ‘Let’s hope so!’

  Still Laura hesitated once she was alone again. It was twelve o’clock at night, much too late to be telephoning anyone. But if she didn’t make the call now she probably never would, would find half a dozen reasons why she shouldn’t.

  To her surprise Gideon answered the telephone himself, putting her completely off guard. She would recognise his husky tones anywhere.

  ‘I—I hope I didn’t wake you,’ she said tentatively.

  The line seemed to crackle with tension for long timeless seconds. ‘Laura?’ his voice was sharp.

  ‘Yes,’ she confirmed huskily.

  ‘Is there anything wrong? Your mother—James—’

  ‘No they—they’re both fine. I—I was just wondering—Er—Gideon, if I told you I was willing to listen now, what would you say?’ The last came out in a rush, and she held her breath as she waited for his answer.

  ‘I would say, are you sure?’ he asked huskily.

  ‘Very sure,’ she answered strongly.

  ‘Then I’m coming over. Is that all right with you?’

  It was very all right with her! ‘Twenty minutes?’ she said breathlessly.

  ‘Make it fifteen,’ he told her before putting down the receiver.

  Well, she had done it now. In fifteen minutes Gideon would be here, in this very room. What would be the outcome of their meeting?

  CHAPTER NINE

  BY the time the doorbell rang fifteen minutes later to announce Gideon’s arrival Laura had got herself into such a state of nerves she hardly knew how to face him.

  She had stood anxiously at the window waiting for his car to draw up outside, running to open the door before he could ring the bell for a second time. Her mother could be asleep by now—although somehow she doubted it.

  Gideon looked extremely handsome in close-fitting faded denims and a navy blue shirt, the latter partly unbuttoned down his throat to reveal the dark hair on his chest.

  ‘Er—Hello,’ she greeted shyly.

  ‘Hello,’ he returned deeply, his expression wary.

  ‘I—Won’t you come in?’ She jerkily opened the door.

  ‘Thanks.’ He stepped inside and walked through to the lounge, at once dominating his surroundings.

  Laura followed him nervously, running her hands down her own denim-clad thighs. What did she say now? She had asked him here, and now she didn’t know what to say to him!

  ‘I didn’t wake you, did I?’ she repeated the remark he hadn’t answered on the telephone.

  ‘No.’ His gaze never left her flushed face.

  Laura shifted uncomfortably. He could at least help her in this. But why should he? She was the one to instigate this late night meeting, he had tried to talk to her often enough in the past and she had rejected him. But that didn’t make it any easier for her to talk to him now!

  ‘Would you like a cup of coffee?’ she offered.

  His mouth twisted. ‘No—thank you,’ he added belatedly.

  ‘Oh.’ She looked down at the carpet, wondering where to start.

  ‘Was this a mistake, Laura?’ he broke tersely into the awkward silence. ‘Would you like me to leave?’

  ‘No!’ she cried pleadingly, looking up into his angry face, the grey eyes glittering with impatience. ‘I don’t know where to start,’ she told him miserably.

  ‘Then I’d better help you,’ he sighed. ‘Can I sit down?’

  ‘Yes—of course,’ she said eagerly. ‘Are you sure you wouldn’t like a cup of coffee?’

  ‘Very sure,’ he drawled, sitting down in one of the armchairs, his long legs stretched out in front of him. ‘Now, we can start with the reason you’ve decided to listen to me.’ His eyes were narrowed as he looked at her. ‘Why have you?’

  ‘I just thought—’

  ‘You did? Alone?’ he asked suspiciously.

  ‘Well… no. But—’

  ‘James!’ He was suddenly tense.

  ‘No,’ she shook her head frantically. ‘It was Nigel.’

  Puzzlement flickered across his hard features. ‘Nigel persuaded you to hear me out?’ he said slowly.

  She gave a rueful smile. ‘I didn’t need much persuading,’ she admitted. ‘When you kissed me earlier—’

  ‘Let’s leave that out of this, Laura,’ Gideon dismissed tersely. ‘It can only cloud the issue.’

  How could she leave her love out of this? If she didn’t love him so much she wouldn’t have been so hurt by what she believed to be his ‘using’ of her, and she wouldn’t have wanted to see him now. But Gideon was making it clear he wasn’t interested in that love. He was here to clear up the misunderstandings of the past, and that was all he was here for.

  She bit her lip. ‘Nigel believes I’ve been wrong about you, about your motives.’

  Gideon’s mouth t
wisted. ‘Big of him.’

  ‘I think so,’ she flashed. ‘Not many men would—would—well, I think it’s very big of him,’ she defended.

  ‘Perhaps,’ he nodded curtly, standing up. ‘I think this was a mistake after all. I have no intention of baring my soul to you in the circumstances. I hope you’ll be very happy with Nigel, he’s a good man.’

  ‘Nigel…? But—’ She watched Gideon walk to the door. ‘Don’t go!’

  He turned angrily, his expression fierce. ‘What more do you want from me, Laura. A confession of love? An admission of need?’ He ran an agitated hand through his tousled dark hair. ‘God knows both are true,’ he added derisively. ‘But if you were expecting any pleas of forgiveness on my part then you’re out of luck. I have nothing to ask forgiveness for. Nothing!’ He turned to leave.

  ‘Gideon, please!’ She ran to him, her hand on his arm preventing him from leaving. One look at his hard unrelenting face was enough to tell her that she had better find the right words this time or lose Gideon for ever. She wet her lips nervously. ‘Gideon, you admitted to love,’ God, she could hardly believe that! ‘And need,’ this she found even harder to believe, never imagining Gideon needing anyone. ‘Well, I admit to love and need too.’ She looked up at him pleadingly.

  His eyes glazed over like chips of ice, his mouth firm. ‘I’m sure Nigel is very happy about that.’

  Temper rose within her at his lack of understanding. ‘You stupid, stupid man!’ she snapped angrily, facing him defiantly as his face darkened. ‘I would hardly want to see you just to tell you I’m in love with Nigel.’

  ‘Wouldn’t you?’ he said bitterly.

  ‘It’s you I love, you I need. But if you’re too stupid to see that, I—Gideon!’ she gasped as he swept her up against him, her feet completely off the ground. ‘Gideon, put me down!’

  ‘Never!’ he growled against her ear. ‘I love you, you confused, utterly adorable child. And I’m going to marry you.’

  She stopped pounding on his chest to slowly look up at him, her eyes huge with wonder in her pale face. ‘You—you are?’

  ‘I am,’ he told her firmly. ‘Any objections, Miss Jamieson?’

  ‘None at all, Mr Maitland,’ she answered in her most efficient secretarial voice.

  ‘Very well.’ Humour lightened his eyes, the tension about his mouth slowly relaxed. ‘Make a note of this, Miss Jamieson. Miss Laura Jamieson and Mr Gideon Maitland will be married a week on Saturday.’

  ‘Gideon, no!’ she gasped. ‘We can’t—I can’t—’

  ‘We can, and you will,’ he said arrogantly.

  ‘I—I will?’

  ‘Yes,’ Gideon nodded. ‘Unless you want to move in with me tonight?’

  ‘No…’

  He looked down at her teasingly. ‘You don’t sound too sure.’

  Laura turned away. ‘It isn’t that.’

  ‘Then what is it?’ he frowned, an edge of uncertainty to his strong, masterful voice.

  ‘You haven’t even kissed me yet!’ she told him in a disgruntled voice.

  ‘Oh, Laura,’ he chuckled throatily, ‘you’ve just given me heaven. And I—I’m almost afraid to kiss you,’ he admitted shakily.

  ‘Afraid?’ she echoed disbelievingly.

  ‘Yes,’ he groaned. ‘What if I lose control?’

  Delicate colour flooded her cheeks. ‘What if you do?’

  ‘We have to talk—’

  She put her fingertips to his lips. ‘We can talk later—much later. Now that I know you love me none of it seems important anyway.’

  His face darkened. ‘It was important enough to break us up.’

  ‘It will still be there to be discussed after you’ve kissed me.’ She looked up at him longingly.

  ‘Will you be this demanding after we’re married?’ Gideon grinned, looking suddenly boyish.

  Married! Just the thought of it gave her a warm glow. ‘I hope so,’ she smiled.

  ‘God, Laura,’ he gave a triumphant groan, ‘I can hardly believe this is happening! After we parted earlier tonight I felt as if the world had come to an end.’

  ‘Will you stop talking,’ she said crossly. Much as she liked listening to the beautiful, wonderful things he was telling her, she would much rather feel his lips on hers, would much rather know his love. ‘And kiss me,’ she pleaded.

  His mouth met hers in a kiss of hunger, slowly lowering her down his body to put her feet once more on the ground, moulding her pliant curves to the hardness of his body, only breaking the kiss to cover her face and throat with soft burning kisses.

  ‘I love you, Laura,’ he told her shakily. ‘And no other woman has ever heard those words from me.’

  She swallowed hard. ‘They haven’t?’

  ‘Never.’ His lips once more claimed hers, one of his hands claiming her breast, the other resting possessively on her thigh.

  Their hunger for each other took some minutes to assuage, their caresses heated as they touched each other in rousing sensuality, until Gideon finally put her away from him, his eyes almost black as he looked at the disarray of her clothes, her breasts bared to his stimulating hands.

  ‘Let’s sit down,’ he said gruffly.

  Once on the sofa Laura moved eagerly into his arms, one of her hands entangled in his hair as she pulled his head down to her, their lips meeting in a show of mutual desire, her other hand resting on the nakedness of Gideon’s chest, his shirt completely unbuttoned and pushed aside by her questing fingers.

  ‘Make love to me, Gideon,’ she pleaded.

  ‘What do you think I’m doing now?’ he asked raggedly.

  ‘I want you completely.’

  ‘Darling—’

  ‘I want you, Gideon,’ she said tearfully. He had roused her to such a pitch that she didn’t want to stop now, wanted to continue to the nerve-shattering conclusion.

  But Gideon was already moving away, fastening her blouse for her with unsteady fingers, a fine sheen of perspiration to his furrowed brow.

  ‘Gideon—’

  ‘I know, darling,’ he cradled her roughly against his chest. ‘But your mother is in her bedroom—’

  ‘Then let’s go to your house. Oh—of course, Lisa is there.’ She looked down awkwardly at her hands.

  Gideon gently raised her chin, looking steadily into her eyes. ‘Lisa is Natalie’s nanny, nothing else.’

  ‘I don’t like her,’ Laura mumbled.

  He gave a rueful smile. ‘I think the feeling is mutual.’

  ‘When we’re married—when we’re married will Lisa still live with us?’ She looked up at him searchingly, believing him when he said the other woman meant nothing to him, but knowing that Lisa Harlow didn’t feel the same way about him.

  ‘Do you want her to?’

  ‘No,’ she replied without hesitation.

  He frowned. ‘There’s Natalie—’

  ‘I’ll take care of her myself.’

  Gideon gave a deep sigh. ‘I think the time has come for that talk,’ he moved to sit in the chair opposite, ‘and I can think better when I can’t touch you.’

  Laura blushed at his admission of lack of control. ‘Maybe we should talk,’ she nodded.

  ‘I think I should tell you about Felicity first.’

  ‘Yes,’ she agreed huskily, tearing her gaze reluctantly away from his rakish attractiveness.

  ‘But before that I have to know you believe I love you,’ he said intently.

  He would never show such vulnerability if he didn’t. ‘I believe you,’ she told him softly, her eyes glowing with her own love for him. ‘I love you,’ she added in case there were any doubts in his mind.

  ‘You said you didn’t,’ he said with remembered pain.

  ‘No, I didn’t. I just challenged the statement, you took it to mean I no longer loved you.’

  ‘An assumption you were quite happy to let me believe.’ He gave her a reproving look.

  She gave him a cheeky smile, sobering as she remembered they had yet t
o talk about his dead wife. ‘Felicity,’ she prompted.

  ‘Yes,’ he acknowledged reluctantly. ‘I went to live with James and Felicity when I was sixteen. I suppose I had what you might call a crush on her at the time. But she was one of those girls who mature early, and I—well, I was a bit of a slow starter.’

  ‘I’d never have believed it,’ Laura teased to ease his tension.

  ‘You’re the recipient of twenty years’ experience,’ he mocked, laughing as she blushed. ‘Anyway,’ he was suddenly serious once more, ‘Felicity knew of my infatuation, and she took great pleasure in teasing me. Then James sent me away to university. I gained self-confidence there—’

  ‘Experience, you mean.’

  ‘Okay, experience,’ he shrugged.

  ‘Was Lisa one of these experiences?’

  ‘Yes,’ Gideon sighed. ‘We went out together for several months. But when I left university all that stopped. I went back to James’s house—’

  ‘To Felicity.’

  ‘Yes. But in my maturity I could now see her for what she was, what James never saw, that she was a shallow butterfly of a woman incapable of feeling deep love for anyone but herself. Oh, she enjoyed trying to make me fall in love with her, increasingly so as it became obvious I wasn’t interested. Unfortunately James had taken it into his head that the two of us should marry.’

  ‘But you didn’t have to do it!’ Laura cried.

  ‘No,’ he agreed heavily. ‘But at the time I couldn’t see any real reason why I shouldn’t. I didn’t love anyone else, and physically we were very compatible. Oh yes,’ he said bitterly at her gasp, ‘Felicity and I had been lovers by this time.’

  ‘So you married.’ Laura wanted to get past the bit where Gideon had enjoyed sleeping with Felicity as soon as possible.

  ‘Not immediately, no. I tried to persuade James that Felicity wouldn’t be happy with me. Contrary to what some people believe, sex isn’t everything in a marriage. Admittedly when that turns sour it rocks the whole marriage, but it shouldn’t be the sole basis for any marriage. Unfortunately James had a heart attack shortly after this—you knew about his heart?’

  ‘He told us,’ Laura nodded.

  ‘In a way I felt responsible. He wanted me to marry Felicity so much—a cementing of his old partnership with my father, I expect. That’s when I married her.’