Savage Alpha (Alpha 8) Read online

  “It’s okay, Lily.” He continued to grin. “You and my wife have a lot in common. Diana thinks we’re all testosterone driven too.”

  “I didn’t say that.” She shifted uncomfortably.

  “Didn’t have to. We’re all warriors.” He sobered. “All trained within an inch of our lives to protect and serve. Jonas more than most, because he’s had that from two different cultures.”

  “I know that,” she acknowledged quietly. “And I’m grateful, I really am. But I think he’s done more than enough to repay any debt he owes Gabriel.” And Lily had taken up more than enough of Jonas’s time. Invaded his private life enough too.

  “So where do you want me to drive you?”

  Chapter 12

  “Okay, where the fuck is she?” Jonas barely waited for Gabriel to open his front door before pushing past the other man and entering the house.

  “Come in, why don’t you?” Gabriel snapped as he closed the door and turned to confront Jonas in the hallway.

  He narrowed his eyes. “Don’t mess with me, Gabriel, I’m not in the mood.” It had been six days since Lily had left her apartment with Seth, and Jonas had absolutely no idea where she was.

  He had gone back to his house in Larchwood after speaking with the police that night. As he had suspected might be the case, again there were no fingerprints, not in the apartment or on the knife sticking out of Lily’s pillow. The knife itself was also one taken from the set of kitchen knives Lily kept beside the cooker, so nothing traceable there either.

  The first three days, Jonas had been too angry at Lily’s dismissal to do any more than lick his wounds. Then the anger had changed to longing when Jonas realized he had gotten used to Lily being in his life, sassing him, challenging him. The house at Larchwood had always been his sanctuary from the professional side of his life, a bolt-hole that no one knew about. All he could see there now was Lily.

  Everywhere.

  In the house, outside the house. He couldn’t walk past the bedroom she’d slept in without remembering the two of them together there. Even that fucking snowman refused to melt like the rest of the snow, and was a constant reminder of her, grinning at him from the front garden as if mocking him while he paced the house endlessly. He’d tried going up to his studio to paint, usually his means of escape, but even that had failed to fill the gap Lily had left in his life.

  Damn it, he not only missed having her around, he missed her.

  Once he’d accepted that, Jonas had decided to drive back to town, his intention being to speak to Lily, explain to her that he needed to be the one protecting her. That the thought of that sick fucker somehow getting to her, hurting her, was eating him up inside.

  He’d telephoned Gabriel as soon as he got back to town, but the other man insisted Lily wasn’t with him. Seth was no help either when Jonas went to the Grayson Security offices. The other man flatly refused to tell him where he’d taken Lily that night, that “the fewer people who know where she is, the better.” Jonas now regretted ever involving the other man.

  “You look as if you need one of these.” Gabriel held up the glass of whisky he was nursing. “Probably for the same reason too,” he muttered as he walked down the hallway to what turned out to be his study when Jonas followed him into the room.

  “Isn’t it a bit early for whisky?”

  “Admittedly, it’s only early afternoon here, but I’m sure the sun has ‘gone over the yardarm’ somewhere in the world.”

  “Thanks.” Jonas took the glass of whisky Gabriel had poured him and drank it down in one swallow. He didn’t even wince as the alcohol burned the back of his throat.

  “Yes, definitely the same reason.” The other man sighed. “Like a refill?”

  “No, thanks.” Jonas slumped down in one of the two chairs on opposite sides of the lit fire. “Lily really isn’t here, is she?”

  “No.” The other man sat in the chair opposite. “Seth won’t tell you where she is either, hmm?”

  “He insists it’s safer this way.” Jonas stared morosely into the dancing flames. “Ordinarily, I would agree with him, would do the same, but… Damn it, I’m the one who allowed him in on this, and now he won’t tell me where Lily is. What?” he demanded when the other man made no reply for several long seconds.

  Gabriel scowled. “I’m just wondering, after what I saw in her apartment the other night, exactly what your interest is in my little sister?”

  Jonas’s eyes narrowed. What Gabriel had seen in Lily’s apartment was nothing compared to what Seth had walked in on. “I had a job to do. I failed to do it.”

  “So your concern is merely professional?”

  Jonas became guarded. “What else?”

  The other man winced. “And is that what you told Lily?”

  “Of course it’s what I told Lily. The bastard got into her dressing room, killed two people she cared about, and then broke into her apartment, violated her bedroom. All on my watch. Because I fucking failed to protect her.”

  “Not that bit. Did you tell her she was only a job to you?”

  “No, of course I… Seth may have implied it,” Jonas realized slowly. “He was angry with me for not telling him I was using my vacation time to work for you. Lily overheard part, if not all, of that conversation. She now knows I took the job of protecting her because I owed you a favor.”

  Gabriel groaned. “And I thought my tact around women was nonexistent. Turns out I’m a complete charmer compared to you.”

  “I wasn’t the one who said she was a job to me.”

  “But you didn’t correct Seth either, did you?”

  “I took her back to my house. Built a fucking snowman with her, because she asked me to, didn’t I?” His tone was defensive. “I drove her back to town, against my better judgment, when she said she had to be here, not there. Even though I knew there was nothing she could do, and the bastard had broken into her apartment when we got here.”

  “You took Lily to your house?”

  “Yes.”

  “The house no one else even knows the location of, let alone has ever been allowed to visit?”

  “Yes.” Resentment entered his voice.

  Gabriel grinned. “You built a snowman with her?”

  Jonas had done a lot more than build a snowman with Lily, but he had no intention of discussing that with her eldest brother. “I didn’t come here to be the butt of your fucking warped sense of humor.”

  Gabriel sobered. “No, you came to find my sister. My question is still why did you? And don’t give me that crap again about finishing a job. You might have convinced Lily that’s the reason, but not me.”

  Jonas surged to his feet. “I’m done here—”

  “You’re done when I say you’re done.” Gabriel stood too, the two men facing off like adversaries. As Jonas towered several inches taller than Gabriel and weighed fifty pounds more, the other man was finally the one to reluctantly back down, his sigh one of frustration. “Jonas, what the hell is going on with you and Lily?”

  Jonas wished he knew. He had never missed a woman before, and this, not even knowing where Seth had taken her, was driving him insane. “Aren’t you curious to know where she is?”

  Gabriel held up his glass of whisky. “This is my second bottle in the past six days. Does that answer your question? All Seth will tell me is she’s safe, despite my having threatened to break both his arms if he didn’t tell me where she is. If you do manage to find her…”

  “Yes?”

  “Let me know, okay?”

  “Okay.”

  “And if—when the two of you talk again, I’d steer clear of repeating the part about her being only a job to you because of an obligation to me.” Gabriel grimaced.

  It had started out that way, Jonas frowned, but it had very quickly turned into something else. Everything inside him, every part of him, veered away from acknowledging what that something else was.

  He breathed heavily. “I’m going to pay Seth a visit at home ra
ther than the office. I doubt he’ll continue to be so closemouthed with Diana present.”

  “Ooh, nasty.”

  Jonas gave a humorless smile. “I’m through playing Mr. Nice Guy. It’s time to bring in the big guns.” He and Diana had formed a mutual respect and affection after an incident in Paris late last year. He doubted she would allow Seth to continue torturing him with evasive answers as to Lily’s whereabouts.

  And it was torture, sheer hell, not even knowing where she was. He should be the one protecting her, damn it.

  He might have lost sight of that for a while that night in her apartment, and made the mistake of allowing her to leave without him, but he’d had plenty of time to regret it since. Once he found her, he wasn’t letting her out of his sight again until he knew she was completely safe.

  Maybe not even then.

  “I have orders from Seth not to allow anyone in.”

  Lily froze as she heard Liam, one of Seth Armstrong’s men, speaking outside her dressing room door.

  These past six days—and nights—had been the longest of her life. So much so she’d breathed a sigh of relief when she spoke to Giles on the telephone four days ago and he told her the police had now released the theater as a crime scene. The theater company had quickly organized an invitation-only gala performance tonight to reopen the play, in honor of Evan and Charlie.

  Yesterday, at rehearsal, had been the first time Lily had ventured out in public since parting from Jonas, and an armed Liam and another Grayson Security employee had accompanied her. Working with Evan’s understudy had been even more surreal than having those armed guards following her everywhere.

  Just another part of the unreality that was now her life.

  And the worst part was no longer having Jonas in it.

  She hadn’t even known him two weeks ago, and now her life seemed empty without him. The only consolation to the situation was that Jonas was no longer in any danger because of her—

  “Don’t make me have to force you to get out of my way,” a voice growled in response to Liam’s statement. “Because I guarantee you’ll lose that argument.”

  A voice that made Lily’s heart beat faster and brought a blush of excitement to her cheeks.

  Jonas!

  He was here. She didn’t question the why or how as she ran across the room to wrench open the door and look at Jonas as he towered threateningly over Liam.

  Several inches taller than the other man, Jonas easily looked at her over Liam’s shoulder. Those piercing blue eyes were hooded, his expression grim. His dark clothing added to the grimness of his appearance: black T-shirt, dark blue jeans, ankle-length black leather duster, those heavy black biker boots.

  Lily couldn’t take her eyes off him.

  Eating him up with my eyes, she recognized self-derisively.

  She forced herself to turn away from that compelling and narrowed gaze. “It’s okay, Liam.” She’d realized over the past few days Liam was another one of Grayson Security’s employees who was ex-military, and an order was an order, to be obeyed to the absolutely letter. “I’m sure Seth didn’t mean for you to include Jonas in that instruction to keep everyone out of my dressing room.”

  Liam gave a grin that said he knew that, he was just enjoying messing with the other man. “Maybe if Jonas asked nicely…”

  “I don’t do nicely,” Jonas snapped.

  “True.” The other man gave an unconcerned chuckle. “Maybe I should have asked friend or foe?”

  “I’m going to demonstrate the foe part of that if you don’t get out of my fucking way—”

  “I’m fine with Jonas being here,” Lily assured Liam quickly as she heard the threat and saw the thundercloud forming on Jonas’s brow.

  “Go get a coffee or something, Liam,” he instructed abruptly.

  The other man’s humor faded as he stepped aside. “I’d prefer to continue standing guard out here. Seth’s orders.”

  “Fine,” Jonas snapped, knowing the other man was only doing his job. Liam didn’t have to enjoy it so fucking much, though.

  Finding Lily had taken him several more hours after leaving Gabriel earlier. The irony of the situation? Diana had revealed Lily had been staying at their home with them for the past six days and nights. Luckily, Seth was still at work, or Jonas might just have strangled him right then and there for having put him through the last eight hours of uncertainty as to Lily’s whereabouts, let alone her safety. As it was, Seth was going to hear more on the subject later.

  Unfortunately, Lily wasn’t still at Seth and Diana’s house. She had apparently already left for the theater to prepare for this evening’s gala performance. But at least she was accompanied by the two bodyguards Seth had allocated to her protection detail. Even so, Jonas couldn’t help but think tonight’s performance, with Lily on stage and vulnerable, was a bad idea.

  She looked thinner than when he had last seen her, paler too, despite the heavy stage makeup, and those beautiful blue-green eyes were still haunted by dark shadows.

  Her dressing room was filled with flowers, their perfume overwhelming as Jonas stepped inside and closed the door behind him. “Any of these from your stalker?”

  “No.”

  “Any more letters?”

  “No.”

  “No more contact in any way?”

  “No.”

  Jonas breathed an inward sigh of relief. Although there was always the possibility it could only be the calm before the storm— What the fuck? Was he reduced to consoling himself with fucking clichés now? Why not? It was better than the alternative—grabbing Lily in his arms, burying his face in the dark cloud of her perfumed hair, and never letting her go.

  The coolness of Lily’s gaze told him she wouldn’t welcome that show of possessiveness from him. “How are you, Jonas?”

  “How am I?” He ran an impatient hand through his shorn hair. “I’m not the one who has a stalker.”

  “Neither am I at the moment.” Lily sat in front of her dressing table. Looking at Jonas’s reflection through the mirror in front of her somehow acted as a shield between them. “What are you doing here?”

  A scowl appeared between his eyes. “You didn’t go to Gabriel’s, and no one knew where you were.”

  She shrugged. “Seth knew where I was.”

  “And he wasn’t talking.”

  She smiled slightly. “No one knew I was at your house either, but that didn’t seem to bother you at the time.”

  “Well, it fucking bothers me now!” Jonas paced the room behind her, reminding Lily of a caged predator, coiled, tensed, and ready to spring at a second’s notice.

  To admit it was good to see him again was an understatement. She literally couldn’t take her eyes off him. That silky blue-black hair against his bronzed flesh. Piercing blue eyes. Sharp cheekbones. Sensual mouth. That muscular body she knew almost as intimately as she knew her own.

  The man she was irrevocably in love with.

  The same man who considered protecting her as just another job. Worse, an obligation because of the debt he owed her brother. A job and obligation that had come with hidden benefits, she acknowledged self-disgustedly, but still a job and obligation.

  She shrugged. “As you can see, I’m perfectly safe.”

  “Appearing in the play tonight is a mistake.”

  “Seth has a dozen men watching outside as well as inside the theater.” She smiled tightly. “I hardly think I’m going to be attacked on stage.”

  “The fact it’s even a remote possibility is unacceptable.”

  “Seth had no problem with it.”

  “That’s because he doesn’t have the same—” Jonas broke off abruptly, knowing he was about to make a complete idiot of himself by claiming Seth didn’t have the same vested interest in her well-being that he did. Which was unfair to Seth; the other man was a professional through and through, and he wouldn’t have allowed Lily to appear in this evening’s performance if he didn’t think he could protect her. It was
ridiculous of Jonas to think that his own feelings for her made him a better protector.

  Whatever those feelings might be.

  Emotions had never been Jonas’s forte. He worked, he ate, he slept, he fucked. Only when he was painting did he allow his emotions to come to the surface.

  Until now.

  Until Lily.

  The thought of anyone harming so much as a hair on her head caused his fists to clench and his gut to churn. He just had no idea what those things meant.

  Any more than he understood his frustration with the distance he now felt between the two of them. Not physically, obviously, because they were in the same room, but in every other way that mattered. They were talking like acquaintances rather than two people who had been lovers only days ago.

  All Jonas wanted was to pull Lily into his arms and take them both back to that previous intimacy.

  The coolness in Lily’s demeanor and voice told him that wasn’t going to happen.

  “I want back on your security detail,” he said instead.

  Her eyes widened. “Why?”

  Jonas recalled Gabriel’s earlier warning concerning Lily’s belief she was only a job to him, an obligation he hadn’t completed. But how the hell else was he supposed to explain the burning need he felt to protect her, when he didn’t completely understand it himself?

  “Never mind.” Lily’s voice was brittle as she saw the answer to that question in Jonas’s frustrated expression. She really was only an unfinished job to him, and she had better not forget it. “If you feel that strongly about it, then I suggest you talk to Seth.”

  His eyes glittered coldly. “Seth is being a pain in my ass.”

  Grateful as she was to Seth, he was being a pain in her ass too. If anything, he was even more protective than Jonas, to the degree he had taken her back to his own home six days ago, once she told him she had no idea where to go to feel safe.

  Lily had protested the suggestion, of course, aware that after only a few weeks of marriage, Seth and his wife were still on their honeymoon and would want to be alone together. The last thing they wanted was a third person sharing their home.