No Longer a Dream Read online

  Caleb was so busy laughing at her childhood and adolescent antics that neither of them showed too much interest in the hamburgers they had ordered for lunch. He was also far from bored, Cat noted with satisfaction.

  'Now it's your turn,' she invited as she ate her banana split for dessert.

  He sobered instantly, and Cat regretted wiping the laughter from his eyes. 'It was nothing like the fun you had growing up,' he bit out, a faraway look in his eyes.

  'It must have been fascinating though,' she prompted. 'Meeting all those film stars.'

  'There's really nothing fascinating about a lot of insecure people trying to lose themselves behind images other people create for them,' he rasped. 'At least when my mother was alive there was some degree of normality to our lives, but after she died I practically grew up on the sets of the films my father had written, in the middle of false images and false values. I still lived in that world of make-believe when I met Deanna; I didn't realise that what she really wanted was my father to write parts for her in his films so that she could be what she had always wanted to be, a "star"!' Bitterness iced his eyes. 'I didn't want a wife that wanted to be away from Luke and me more than she was with us, so I gave her an ultimatum. She left, because by that time she had the stardom she wanted. It was then that I decided Luke wasn't going to grow up in that fantasy world the way I had.'

  'That was why he went to live with his grandfather,' Cat realized.

  'Yes,' he grated.

  'But you let that fantasy world continue to run your own life,' she frowned.

  'No,' he scorned. 'I now run that fantasy world.' His mouth twisted. 'I prefer it that way. And Luke was happy living with his grandfather.'

  But Caleb had lost out on so much, had lost that closeness with his son that was so important.

  'Before you talk to my father this afternoon there's something I think you should know,' he bit out.

  Oh God! She hadn't been right about what she had seen in his eyes this morning, had she?

  Caleb drew in a ragged breath. 'When I once told you Lucien is more lucid than a lot of men half his age I spoke the truth,' he said slowly. 'Most of the time he is,' he added softly. 'But sometimes—not very often,' he swiftly assured her, 'he wanders. And what he says during those times doesn't make much sense.' He looked at her intently, trying to gauge her reaction to what he had just told her.

  Cat frowned. 'Is that why you didn't want me to meet him?'

  'Yes,' he sighed.

  Her hand lightly touched his across the table. 'A lot of elderly people wander off into their past, Caleb,' she reassured him. 'It doesn't detract from their intelligence. And your father is obviously still a very talented man.'

  He nodded abruptly. 'But some of the things he says when he wanders aren't believable—or pleasant.'

  She gave him an understanding smile. I'm not here to write about your father as he is now, Caleb; I'm sure his work does that for him. I only want to know about his marriage to your mother.'

  He gave another deep sigh. 'Well, you can't say I didn't warn you.'

  Cat went out of her way to make him laugh again on the drive back to the house, knew it had taken a lot of courage for him to talk about his father the way he had. But Vikki's grandmother had always been one to live in the past, the stories of her youth fascinating. She was sure she could cope with Lucien Steele's lapses.

  The two of them were laughing companionably together over her efforts at skiing as they entered the Steele house.

  'Well, well, well,' mocked a contemptuous voice. 'And here was I thinking you were sure to be at each others' throats by now.'

  All of the humour left Cat's flushed face as she turned to face their tormentor as he supported himself on short arm crutches, his broken leg still in plaster. Luke Steele!

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  He looked at them both with coldly derisive eyes, that insolent gaze boldly sweeping over Cat's wind-tousled appearance before moving to the narrow-eyed man at her side, his own mouth tightening as he recognised that his father's indulgent humour of a few moments ago had been completely wiped out as he looked at him.

  'What the hell are you doing here?' Caleb demanded impatiently.

  Luke didn't blink an eyelid in the face of his father's displeasure, his expression remaining insolent. 'I live here,' he bit out, his gaze sliding once again to Cat. 'Or has that changed in the last two days?' he challenged.

  Cat felt rather than saw Caleb's tension increase, and she wished there were something she could do to help the situation between this angry man and his defiant son. But she knew she couldn't, that it was none of her business. Luke was only using her as a stick to beat his father with, and when Caleb no longer rose to the bait, he would move on to something else that put his father on the defensive.

  'You know damn well it hasn't,' Caleb rasped. 'But it's been so long since you came here that— how did you get here?' he frowned.

  'I instructed your pilot and he brought me,' Luke derided.

  His father's mouth thinned. 'I'm sure your grandfather was surprised to see you.'

  'Not particularly,' Luke dismissed carelessly. 'I rang him last night and told him I was thinking of coming up; he thought it was a good idea.'

  No emotion showed in Caleb's eyes at this last disclosure, and yet Cat knew he was hurt that Luke had chosen to talk to his grandfather and not to him. They had lost so much, this father and son!

  'And talking of grandfather,' Luke drawled, cold blue eyes once more turning on Cat, 'I'm afraid my arrival has tired him out, so he doesn't feel up to your little chat this afternoon now. You'll just have to be satisfied with my father until tomorrow morning.' He gave a scornful look that seemed to encompass them both. 'Although that doesn't seem to have bothered you so far.'

  Caleb's hands clenched into fists at his sides, his eyes glacial. 'You will re-phrase that last statement,' he ordered through gritted teeth.

  'About it bothering her?' Luke taunted. 'But I can't see anything—'

  'No, damn it!' his father bit out furiously. 'I realise this may be a little difficult for you to do,' he rasped, 'but you'll treat Cat with respect!'

  Cat swallowed hard at again becoming the focus of contention between these two men. 'Caleb, it doesn't mat—'

  'Apologise for your insinuation,' Caleb coldly instructed Luke, ignoring Cat's dismissal.

  'Why?' his son challenged.

  'Haven't you done her enough harm already?' Caleb accused icily.

  Luke's eyes widened. 'My God,' he taunted. 'I'm not going to be presented with a stepmother at this stage in my life, am I?'

  All colour drained from Cat's cheeks, leaving her deathly white, putting out a hand to stop him as Caleb would have swung a punch at his son. 'That isn't going to help, Caleb,' she pleaded.

  'You mean it's true?' Luke scorned. 'Good God, I thought you had more sense than to let yourself be caught by a woman I put in your bed!'

  'Caleb, remember his leg!' she shouted as this time it seemed he would go ahead with striking his son.

  He stopped himself with effort, standing only inches from Luke now, the taller by a couple of inches. 'You are going to apologise to Cat,' he told the younger man with deadly calm.

  The blue eyes widened only fractionally as Luke assessed his father's mood, long timeless seconds passing before he gave a barely perceptible shrug of his shoulders. 'What am I apologising for?' he sighed. 'The fact that she's now your mistress, or the fact that I know about it?'

  'Caleb, no!' She managed to stop him as once again he would have hit his son, looking at Luke with pitying eyes. 'You know, by the time you grow up there could be no one around to impress!'

  His cheeks reddened. 'I don't have to take that from my father's—'

  'Friend,' she calmly substituted for the crude word she was sure he had been going to use, sure that if he had it would have pushed Caleb too far, and that this time she wouldn't be able to stop him. 'Now I don't know why you're so angry at your father, Luke, that's
between the two of you, but I won't be brought into it. Do you understand?' she prompted hardly.

  'I don't—'

  'Luke, the condition you're in at the moment even I could knock you to the ground,' she warned. 'I'd probably enjoy it, too, but you would look a little foolish.'

  He drew in an angry breath. 'All right, I apologise,' he said flatly—and without the least shred of sincerity.

  'That isn't—'

  'It's really all right, Caleb.' She turned to give him a tight smile. 'I think if you don't mind I'll go and make my telephone call now.'

  'Cat!'

  She turned at the foot of the stairs, pain in her eyes as she looked at Caleb.

  Ignoring his son completely he walked over to her, gently touching her cheek. 'You'll come down to dinner?' he prompted.

  She knew he must have guessed that she had intended staying in her room. She had no doubt Lucien Steele would once again not be present for the meal, not if he didn't feel up to seeing her now, and as Norm didn't seem to be much help during these encounters she didn't relish the thought of finding herself caught in the middle of these two men again.

  'Don't worry, Miss Howard,' Luke drawled at her hesitation. 'I'm always in a more pleasant mood once I've eaten.'

  Her eyes flashed as she glared at him. 'You must have a very inflated ego if you think your mood is of the least interest to me,' she told him dismissively. 'I was merely regretting the fact that your father and I wouldn't be alone tonight as we were yesterday.' She watched the angry flush darken his cheeks before turning to Caleb with triumphant warmth. 'I wouldn't dream of not joining you for dinner,' she assured him.

  He smiled at her. 'I'll look forward to it—'

  'If this is going to run like a scene from Romeo and Juliet I think I'll go out into the garden and throw up!' Luke stormed awkwardly out the front door.

  The humour instantly left Caleb's eyes to be replaced by a pained frown. 'I'm sorry you had to be caught in the middle of that,' he rasped darkly. 'I can assure you it wasn't personal.'

  'I know that.' She squeezed his arm understandingly. 'Is he always so—angry?'

  'Most of the time,' Caleb nodded sadly.

  'Have you ever tried talking to him about your reasons for sending him to his grandfather fifteen years ago?' she prompted gently.

  His mouth tightened, 'If you think that's the reason he's like he is then let me assure you it isn't.' He shook his head. 'Until a few years ago we were quite close.'

  'What happened?' she frowned.

  'Are you asking as my "friend" or as a reporter?' he drawled.

  'I've told you more times than I care to think about, I am not that type of reporter!'

  'Then, who knows?' His gaze was suddenly evasive as he shrugged dismissively. 'I love my son, Cat, but I can't protect him from everything.'

  'Then something is troubling him?'

  His expression darkened and he was suddenly very remote. 'Only the usual pains of growing up,' he bit out abruptly, stepping back. 'He'll get over it, we all do.'

  His voice lacked sincerity, his gaze still evasive, and Cat wisely decided it was really none of her business as she ran lightly up the stairs.

  A glance out of the bedroom window showed Luke wasn't 'throwing up' in the garden at all but clumping around it on his crutches, oblivious to the falling snow. He looked lonely and alone, and more than a little lost with his guard down.

  Cat turned away, knowing he wouldn't welcome her intrusive curiosity if he should glance up and see her watching him. It wasn't just the painful process of growing up that was bothering him, she was sure of it.

  'How are you? Where are you?' Vikki cried excitedly a few minutes later as soon as Cat had identified herself on the phone. 'Is Caleb there? What's Lucien Steele like? Do you—'

  'Will you slow down?' Cat laughed teasingly. 'You aren't giving me time to answer you!'

  'Oh. Oh no,' Vikki conceded ruefully. 'Well?' she prompted impatiently.

  'I'm fine.. Caleb is here. Mr Steele seems very nice,' she answered drily.

  'And you aren't going to say where you are,' Vikki guessed as she omitted to answer that question.

  'No, I—' She broke off as there was a strange noise on the line. 'Vikki? Are you still there?'

  'I was just wondering the same about you,' her friend returned dearly, 'It sounded as if we were cut off,' she added in a puzzled voice.

  Or someone had put down an extension! God, didn't Caleb know her well enough, trust her enough by now, to realise she wouldn't betray that confidence? The line seems to be all right now,' she bit out tautly.

  'Yes,' Vikki still sounded puzzled, and then she seemed to dismiss the faulty line. 'Have you done your interview yet?'

  Tomorrow,' she said abruptly, still angry at having her call listened in on. Because there could be no other explanation for what she had heard.

  'And has Caleb succeeded in seducing you yet?' Vikki teased.

  'Isn't that presuming that he's trying to?' she returned lightly.

  'I know he's trying to,' Vikki mocked.

  Had he succeeded? Until he had shut her out concerning his son, and that strange clicking sound on the phone just now, she would have said she was definitely falling under the magnetism of his charm and seduction. But it had been a fragile emotion at best, and his distrust of her had destroyed it.

  'Maybe,' she avoided.

  'But it isn't working.' Vikki sounded disappointed.

  'Anyone would think you were trying to get rid of me,' she derided.

  'Then anyone would be wrong,' Vikki instantly denied. 'I'm just waiting to hear your opinion on lust before trying it myself!'

  They both laughed at that. Vikki's long-term relationship with Sam was platonic to say the least.

  Cat didn't hesitate, after ringing off a short time later, in going downstairs to look for Caleb, finding him in what she had been informed by the maid was 'the master's study', he and Norm pouring over some papers on his desk.

  Norm took one look at her stormy face and straightened. 'I think this is where I came in,' he drawled derisively.

  Caleb frowned across at her, his eyes narrowing. 'Except nothing happened in either Cat's or my bed last night,' he rasped slowly.

  'I'll come back later,' Norm said quickly, closing the door behind him.

  'How could you?' Cat instantly accused. 'How dare you?' she blazed. 'What did you think I was doing, telephoning a newspaper and telling them where your father is?' she added disgustedly. 'I thought you trusted me—'

  'I do,' he cut in quietly, standing up to pull out a chair for her in front of his desk. 'Sit down and tell me what's wrong.'

  'You know what's wrong,' she spluttered indignantly, ignoring the chair, having no intention of putting herself at such a disadvantage by sitting when he was standing. 'I asked you if I could call Vikki. You had only to say if you minded—'

  'But I didn't. And I don't.' He frowned at her vehemence.

  'Only because you know I haven't told Vikki where we are,' she snapped.

  'Cat—'

  'If listening to other people's conversations is part of "your world" then I'm glad I don't belong to it!'

  'Someone listened in on your conversation to Vikki?' he realised slowly.

  She gave him a scathing look. 'Don't try to pretend it wasn't you—'

  'But it wasn't,' he cut in coldly. 'And if we're making accusations about trusting people…' he added icily.

  She looked at him searchingly, the chill of his eyes, the firm anger of his mouth. 'It wasn't you,' she sighed regretfully. 'But if not you, who— Luke?' she questioned dazedly, remembering that the younger man had been coming towards the house before she made her telephone call. 'Do you think it was him?' she grimaced.

  'Perhaps.' He gave a cold inclination of his head. 'Unless you imagined it?'

  The laughing companion of the day had gone, and in his place the arrogant stranger of that first morning. Cat felt regret for that; she had liked that other Caleb. 'I d
idn't imagine it,' she said flatly. 'And I'm sorry if I was mistaken about the identity of the person that did it.'

  She wasn't easily forgiven, Caleb's expression not softening in the slightest. 'I'll talk to Luke about it,' he rasped. 'Although I wouldn't expect an apology from him,' he added. 'He very rarely apologises for his behaviour.'

  'Caleb—'

  'If that's all, Cat.' He cut across her pleading tone. 'I have some work to do.'

  She shouldn't have just assumed the eavesdropper was him, she knew that now. He may have seemed the obvious choice at the time, but the more she thought about it the more she realised she should have known it wouldn't be him; he hadn't needed to have her brought here in the first place, could have ignored his father's invitation to her or just told his father she had refused, but he had obviously trusted her enough not to do either of those things.

  She put both her hands on his arm. 'I really am sorry.' Green eyes pleaded with remote black ones. 'I was just so angry—'

  'With perfect right.' Some of the tension left his body. 'As I made it clear at the onset that I didn't approve of your visit here perhaps you felt it could be no one else but me. But surely you must have realised I've changed my mind about you since you arrived?' He allowed her briefly to see the pain in his eyes.

  She had hurt him, really hurt him, with her accusation, and with good reason! 'Caleb, please don't be angry with me—'

  'Angry with you?' he repeated harshy. 'I've opened up to you more than any other woman for a very long time only to be met with suspicion and rejection; why the hell should I be angry?'

  She winced at the truth of his words, knew that today the coldly remote Caleb Steele had been absent, and in his place had been an indulgent lover. And she had liked that other Caleb. Too much? Was she deliberately trying to push him away before he got too close? Wasn't it already too late for that, hadn't she come to care for him in spite of herself?

  'Cat?'

  She focused on him with an effort, realising her hands were still on his arm, stepping back selfconsciously, her expression apprehensive.